Had a good friend drop by today for a few hours just to hang out. The best part was that he started the conversation with, "so tell me about the elephant" (referring of course to my ECD). I would guess that people often want to ask how others are doing with their personal issues, whatever they may be and just don't know how to start the conversation.
As a Pastor I have never had this problem, it seems to be expected that I will speak with people about the most personal moments of their lives. I have learned a few things though that might help.
First, people are pretty good at explaining their own limits, meaning if they don't want to talk about it they will let you know.
Second, most people are desperately seeking for someone to show they care.
Third, we often think that people are probably already being cared for, talked to, or helped by someone else. This is normally not true!
So what did I say when asked about how I was doing? I gave him an update, talked about my frustrations, shared my concerns, and explained I looked forward to the PET scan I have scheduled for 9/5 because it will define the extent to which this disease process has spread (or not). Are things great for me right now? Not really, but talking about it doesn't change me or hurt me. What it does do is let me see that people care.
Show people you care this week by sharing in their life (both the good and bad).
As a Pastor I have never had this problem, it seems to be expected that I will speak with people about the most personal moments of their lives. I have learned a few things though that might help.
First, people are pretty good at explaining their own limits, meaning if they don't want to talk about it they will let you know.
Second, most people are desperately seeking for someone to show they care.
Third, we often think that people are probably already being cared for, talked to, or helped by someone else. This is normally not true!
So what did I say when asked about how I was doing? I gave him an update, talked about my frustrations, shared my concerns, and explained I looked forward to the PET scan I have scheduled for 9/5 because it will define the extent to which this disease process has spread (or not). Are things great for me right now? Not really, but talking about it doesn't change me or hurt me. What it does do is let me see that people care.
Show people you care this week by sharing in their life (both the good and bad).
Today is 9/6/2013. Your dates don't have the year, but presumably your PET was yesterday. How did that experience feel for you? It's likely too early for medical opinions to have caught up to you just yet. What is YOUR sense now that the scan is behind you?
ReplyDeleteI tell you it is always a little disconcerting to have the doctor come into the room sit down and ask you to explain your disease to them. That is what happened at my PET Scan yesterday. Unfortunately that happens a lot, sometimes it is funny and other times it scares me.
ReplyDeleteI found the whole experience very calming and surreal. The whole time I was in a room alone, I wasn't thinking about anything, I wasn't worried, I just was.